'His final wish': RI couple weds in hospital by father's bedside
NORTH PROVIDENCE, R.I. (WPRI) — Sabrina Silveira DaCosta likes to think that she was her late father's best friend.
"My sister would argue that point," she said with a laugh.
Francisco "Frank" Silveira moved to Rhode Island from the Azores when he was just 12 years old.
Silveira DaCosta told 12 News her father loved to cook and worked for years as an executive chef at St. George's School in Middletown.
(Courtesy: The Silveira Family)
"I grew up knowing my dad as a chef," Silveira DaCosta said. "He was just one of those guys everybody knew."
Silveira said her father also catered hundreds of weddings throughout his career, and even served tea to renowned poet Maya Angelou while working at the boarding school.
"He had all of these wonderful stories and he was a big storyteller," she said.
It was while working at St. George's School that he was diagnosed with Limb-Girdle Muscular Dystrophy, a genetic disease that causes muscle weakness, especially in the arms and legs.
"He went from walking and running around after my brother and I when we were little to using a cane to help him walk," she recalled. "Then it progressed to him needing to use a mobility scooter for a while."
The disease eventually progressed to the point where Silveira could no longer walk and relied on an electric wheelchair to get around.
"I can't remember the last time I saw him walk," Silveira DaCosta said.
Despite the diagnosis, Silveira DaCosta said her father never lost his spirit and continued providing for his family the best he could.
Silveira DaCosta became even closer with her father as a teenager when she would help her mother take care of him.
"Everything kind of changed," Silveira DaCosta said. "My mom became his primary caregiver, but even as a young teenager I was also my dad's caregiver."
"I learned so much by becoming my dad's second set of hands," she continued.
(Courtesy: The Silveira Family)
Even though her husband Sam DaCosta met Silveira long after his diagnosis, he said the man was still "a force" who refused to slow down.
"I'm sure that that was one of the most difficult parts for him," DaCosta said. "The situation he found himself in was so opposite of who he was."
Silveira DaCosta always looked forward to the day her father would walk her down the aisle and give her away to her true love. She remained hopeful for that possibility after DaCosta proposed in May 2022.
"My dad and I have been close since I was a little girl and he was so excited to walk me down the aisle on my wedding," Silveira DaCosta said.
But as their wedding crept closer, Silveira's health rapidly declined.
It became clear that their wedding day wouldn't go as planned when Silveira was admitted to Fatima Hospital last week. He was transferred to Continuum Care Hospice of Rhode Island shortly after.
Silveira confided in his daughter earlier this year that he just wanted to make it to her wedding.
"He kept telling us he was fine even when he wasn't," Silveira DaCosta said. "He said he was fine until he absolutely couldn't do it anymore."
(Courtesy: The Silveira Family)
To fulfill her father's last wish, Silveira DaCosta said his ICU nurses and their families got straight to work planning a special ceremony.
Silveira was there as the couple married at his bedside on Monday, but not before he escorted his daughter down the hallway and into DaCosta's arms.
"It was the most difficult and most special day of my life," Silveira DaCosta said. "He told me that I looked beautiful and that he was so happy for me."
"He cried as we said our vows and smiled as we kissed," she continued. "I'm just happy he was there."
Silveira took his last breath an hour after the ceremony.
"It was hard to be joyous for such a sad occasion, but he was there with us when we got married," Silveira DaCosta said. "This was his final wish."
DaCosta explained that his aunt got ordained the weekend before, meaning Silveira watched them legally get married.
"I had that conversation with him and said, 'Hey, she's going to be in good hands,'" DaCosta recalled. "I think he needed to hear that more [than I needed to tell him]."
Silveira DaCosta said it hasn't really hit her yet, explaining that she's been "grieving her entire life for the life her father lost" when he was first diagnosed.
(Courtesy: The Silveira Family)
"Now I'm grieving the loss of his life," Silveira DaCosta said. "It's harder to transition than I expected."
Their original wedding ceremony is still scheduled for Sept. 7, and although her father won't physically be there, Silveira DaCosta said he will be in spirit through the meals he helped them pick months prior.
"He shared his love through food," she said. "It's something I'm grateful I grew up with."
The couple plans on moving in with Silveira DaCosta's mother after their wedding and already has a plan on how to keep her father's memory alive.
"Growing up, we had sit-down dinners every night," Silveira DaCosta said. "We're going to continue to do it once we move in with my mom."
"I'm happy that we can still keep that tradition alive, because that was so important to my dad," she continued. "It makes us feel like he's still with us, and I know he already is."
The couple is asking everyone to donate to the Muscular Dystrophy Association in Silveira's memory.
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