She Discovered Her Husband Was Having An Affair Online Before He Proposed, So Now She Wants To End Their Marriage
This 28-year-old woman and her husband, Alex, who is 29, have been married for seven months now, and they dated for three and a half years before they tied the knot.
Before just a few weeks ago, their relationship seemed absolutely perfect, too. But then, she stumbled upon some text messages that upended her world.
It all began while she was reorganizing their home office when she found one of Alex’s old phones in a drawer. At that point, she became really curious and decided to look through it.
It was then that she found months of flirty text messages between Alex and a woman named Lisa, which took place nearly a year ago.
“The chats started innocuously enough, with Lisa asking Alex if he was single. To my horror, he replied, ‘Yes, I’m single. I don’t even talk to any girls,'” she recalled.
“My heart sank as I continued reading.”
Eventually, the texts also escalated from casual flirting to more inappropriate messages. Only a few weeks into talking to each other, Alex and Lisa also started saying they loved each other frequently.
“I felt sick to my stomach. There was no evidence that they had ever met in person, as Lisa lived in another state, but the emotional betrayal was undeniable,” she said.
She also saw that Alex stopped talking to Lisa abruptly – right around the time he proposed. Nonetheless, she still confronted her husband about the messages, and after becoming defensive at first, he wound up admitting to the cheating.
nenetus – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
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Alex swore that his affair with Lisa was just an “online thing” and that they never met in person. He also claimed to have stopped communicating with Lisa altogether before he popped the question since he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.
So, her husband started begging for her forgiveness and saying that it was a “stupid mistake,” promising he’d been faithful to her ever since he proposed.
Despite that, she was understandably furious at him and felt betrayed in countless ways. While she and Alex were living together and planning for their future, he was having an affair online.
Perhaps the most shocking part, though, is that his family and friends have actually gotten involved and taken Alex’s side!
They keep telling her that Alex stopped talking to Lisa before they got married and, since the affair was just online, it “didn’t mean anything.”
Plus, they claimed that since Alex never actually met up with Lisa and “physically cheated,” she should just move on.
“What they fail to understand is that it wasn’t just about the physical aspect. He was emotionally invested in another woman while being with me, and that hurts deeply,” she explained.
“They keep telling me that he made a mistake but corrected it before our marriage and that I shouldn’t let a mistake from the past ruin our future.”
Still, she can’t help but feel disrespected and hurt, and it really feels like their whole relationship had been a lie. She can’t understand how Alex was so easily able to flirt, show love, and be romantic with another woman while already being in a committed relationship with her.
“It feels like a massive breach of trust that I can’t just overlook,” she vented.
That’s why she has actually been contemplating divorcing Alex, and while some of her friends think that would be justified, others believe that she should just forgive him.
So now, she’s unsure if wanting to end her marriage over the old text messages she found is an overreaction or not.
Can you understand why she feels so betrayed? Do you think it makes the situation any better that Alex stopped talking to Lisa before he proposed or not? What would you do in her shoes?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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