She Feels Like She Has No Choice But To Pick Between The Man She Loves Or Getting To Be A Mom
Sadly, this 34-year-old woman feels like she’s some sort of failure because she has not yet given birth to kids of her own.
While she’s dating an amazing 35-year-old man named Gaspard, who is everything she’s ever dreamed of, that’s not enough.
Gaspard has two kids from a previous relationship, and he has 50/50 custody of them.
“The weight of just being a stepmother is starting to become heavy,” she explained. “Everyone around me has children.”
“My best friends, cousins, brother, and coworkers—all of them are parents. On my side, despite my deep desire to have children, I never had the chance to get pregnant in my previous relationship.”
When Gaspard entered her life, he admitted to her that he did not want to have any more kids.
He also stated he wanted to get a procedure done to prevent any unplanned pregnancies. Back then, she made peace with his position on children, as she felt like it wasn’t her place to say anything.
It’s been two years since this topic came up, and since Gaspard failed to get the procedure done, she’s starting to resent his position on more kids.
“My biological clock has been ticking loudly since I was 15,” she said. “Back then, my group of friends made a bet that I would be the first to have kids because my maternal side was already so strong, and I talked a lot about my desire to have a family of three kids. Twenty years later, they all have families, but I don’t.”
Anton – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
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She has one sibling, a brother, who is married with children. Her brother made her the godfather of all his kids.
She’s a godmother, too, to her best friend’s two little ones. She truly believed that having such a special role in the lives of five children would help diminish her desire to give birth to her own kids.
But this has only done the opposite, and it’s increasingly causing her more heartache each year that she’s not a mom.
“Last night, before we fell asleep, I admitted to Gaspard that I was thinking about breaking up so I could see if a pregnancy could happen in the future,” she added.
“I love this man with all my heart, truly. But the idea of never experiencing motherhood is something that’s starting to weigh heavily on my mental health. He panicked, reminding me how much he loves me and how I’ve filled the void he suffered from before.”
“He told me I’m an incredible stepmother and a fantastic person and that the idea of losing me was something he couldn’t bear. I agree—I don’t think I could find someone I love as much as him again. I feel stuck. I’m forced to choose between love and motherhood.”
“I feel incredibly alone and misunderstood. I feel powerless and incomplete. I don’t know what to do because even if I leave, there’s no guarantee I’ll have a child later, so the risk is huge. I don’t know what to do to be happy in my life…”
What advice do you have for her?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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