Jon Stewart Is Rightfully Including Bill Clinton in the Epstein Jokes
There’s never gonna be a moment in this lifetime or the next where I say that Donald Trump should be able to move past this Epstein Files debacle. It should be how he spends the rest of his life, and we should make sure it's a highlighted section in his legacy that he was heavily involved with prolific pedophile Jeffrey Epstein. Rightfully, Jon Stewart spent another Monday night monologue on The Daily Show covering the absolutely bonkers ways Trump has been trying to spin the increasingly overwhelming evidence against him. Saying you never “had the privilege” to visit Epstein’s island? Saying pardoning Ghislaine Maxwell is something you’re “allowed to do”? It’s not innocent, as the kids say. But do you know who else’s name has popped up in the Epstein Files news? The world’s most irritating vegan and the 42nd president, Bill Clinton. According to reporting from The Wall Street Journal, he was the other U.S. president to have written a card in the infamous “birthday book” given to Epstein as a present from Ghislaine Maxwell. Clinton and Trump joined other standup guys like former Victoria’s Secret owner Les Wexner and attorney Alan Dershowitz. And while Trump is certain to use Clinton’s inclusion in the book and alleged inclusion in the files as a way to mine partisan distraction away from his own involvement, it doesn’t mean anyone should be letting Mr. Jazz get off scot-free either. Like Trump, Clinton has been involved in notable sex scandals and has been credibly accused of sexual assault. The accusations might not compare in breadth or scope to Trump, but it doesn’t make them any less important. Thankfully, Stewart is deft enough to both cut through Trump’s bullshit while still letting the audience know that two presidents, not just one, are deeply embroiled within this saga. “By the way, I never went to the island,” Trump said during an interview with the Scottish press. “But Bill Clinton went, uhhh… 28 times.” Stewart responded with a pregnant pause and some eye-rolling. “You expect me to believe that Bill Clinton went to the island only 28 times?” Stewart exclaimed, to a mix of groans and laughs in the audience. “No way. If anyone had VIP Diamond Island Status… There’s probably still parrots alive on that island going, ‘Hey Bill, back again. Hey Bill, back again.’”I can’t lie. Stewart does a terrible parrot impression, and he knows it, because he broke after he finished the avian impersonation. It’s alright though. You get a little extra wiggle room for delivery when you’re implying that two U.S. presidents are involved in a global child sex-trafficking ring.
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