If you’re interested in a guy, don’t wait for him to do something. Follow these tips on how to make the first move on a guy.
Ladies, we’re well into the 2020s! Don’t hesitate to make the first move on the guy you like.
Yes, men can be weird. They may show you some clear signs that they’re interested in you, but when it’s time to ask you out or get your number, nothing happens. But you are a girlboss who won’t sit and wait for a guy to come to her. You’ll show these men how it’s done.
How to make the first move on a guy – The best strategies that work!
Many people have anxiety, and just like women, men can be shy and nervous as well. However, society expects them to be the ones to initiate.
They have to approach the woman, ask her out, face rejection, and come up with creative date ideas. This doesn’t really make it easier for women, especially those who hate being in a passive position.
Let’s start changing that by making the first move on the guy you like. Here are 23 tips that will help you succeed:
1. Look for signs that he’s interested
Before you make your move, make sure to look for signs that he’s interested. Pay attention to everything he does. Does he laugh at your jokes, make eye contact with you, or touch you subtly?
When a guy likes you, you’ll know even when he tries to hide it. Most men are easier to read than women. [Read: Does he like me? 18 signs to decode his body language]
2. Read his body language
A person’s body language will show if they like you or not. It’s not 100% certain, but usually, when people mirror those that they’re into, that means they like them.
If he’s leaning into you and copying your body movements, he could be interested. You don’t lean into people that you don’t want near you because that wouldn’t give off the right signal. [Read: Male body language – 48 subtle signs to instantly read a man’s thoughts]
3. Be casual
This guy may really like you but he doesn’t make the first move because anxiety is holding him back, or he’s just nervous. To remove the extra pressure he’s putting on himself, you need to play it cool and make him feel comfortable.
Keep it nice and casual. Don’t come on too strong. The less pressure he feels, the better. [Read: Charming ways to be more approachable to guys]
4. Is he single?
It’s not uncommon that you’re flirting with a guy only to find out later that he has a girlfriend. What a waste of time.
Whether he was only being nice or he was really flirting back, you should still not get involved in such a situation. Never make a move on someone who’s taken. It’s a dangerous game that no one can win. [Read: What makes someone a player? The 21 sly signs of a player’s mind]
5. Don’t show jealousy
If another girl approaches him and starts chatting him up, don’t show your jealousy. Maybe you really are jealous, which is totally normal. But he doesn’t owe you loyalty because you two aren’t together.
What you don’t want to do is act all crazy and possessive. It only makes him think that you’re insecure and have low self-esteem.
Besides, she could be a co-worker or a friend, and it wouldn’t make the guy like you better if you were rude to his friend. [Read: Jealousy vs. envy – 22 signs to tell them apart when they feel the same]
6. If you get rejected, keep moving
If you want to know how to make the first move on a guy, you have to be prepared for possible rejection. Rejection is normal. It’s like going to a job interview. You won’t get every job you applied to, so not every guy is going to be interested in you.
And honestly, that’s for the best. Imagine if every guy liked you. Think about all the drama that would cause.
So if the guy you’ve been eyeing finds someone else or is in a relationship, just move on. [Read: How to handle rejection without making a fool of yourself]
7. Show you’re interested
If you want to make a move on a guy, you have to show him that you like him. If he’s giving you flirtatious body language and signs that he’s interested, do it back.
Touch his arm, flirt, and make eye contact. Men aren’t mind-readers. But, be careful not to cross that fine line between interest and desperation. [Read: Can a girl ask a guy out before he asks her out?]
8. Don’t point out that you’re making a move
This guy may be nervous or shy, and that’s why he’s hesitant about making the first move. So, you’re making it instead, which is great. However, don’t go rubbing it in the poor guy’s face that you’re the one making the first move. It’s not exactly a confidence booster.
Plus, who cares if you make the first move? This isn’t a competition, and you don’t get an award for it. [Read: How to get a guy to ask you out in sneaky ways]
9. Don’t use a wing-woman or a wing-man
You can approach a guy on your own. If he’s with another friend, don’t worry, his friend will get the hint and make use of his time.
Using a wing-woman or a wing-man makes it look like you’re hunting, which can be intimidating, especially if the guy is shy. [Read: How to be the most approachable girl at the bar]
10. Stay away from groups
Men would never approach a group of women and start hitting on one. They know the golden rule. Groups are just generally a bad idea. Plus, if his friends don’t like you, they’ll tell him.
So, wait until he’s alone so he can make the choice himself. [Read: 20 subtle secrets to play It cool with a guy & not be distant or clingy]
11. Have a movie night
Netflix and chill is the oldest trick and the book that still works wonderfully. If you’re already friends or have gone out and nothing has happened, invite him over for a movie night.
You know what that means. He knows what that means. We all know what it means. It’s the two of you on a couch, under a blanket, watching a movie you’ve both seen. There’s no escape, and he’ll know it’s coming. [Read: 20 foolproof ways to ask a guy out on a date – that he’ll love]
12. Sip on that champagne
You two can always go out for a drink. Having a glass of wine will help calm the nerves for both of you. At the end of the day, it’s just overthinking that’s preventing you from moving forward.
Alcohol is a good way to lighten the mood. Just don’t end up getting wasted. [Read: Drunk kiss – 15 types, levels of kisses & the meaning of a drunk makeout]
13. Take them somewhere romantic
Whether he’s picking you up or you’re the one driving, suggest a romantic spot.
Possibly somewhere with a sunset? Someplace where you two can be alone and enjoy yourselves without any distractions. You two can sing in the car and then talk to get to know each other better. [Read: How to attract a guy – 17 no-fail ways to make him stay forever]
14. Kiss him anywhere but the lips
Your first move doesn’t have to be a kiss on the lips. You can kiss him on the cheek or on the shoulder. It doesn’t have to be something sexual. Just keep it sweet and simple.
Once you’ve opened that realm, he’ll be able to take charge and give you that kiss you’ve been waiting for. [Read: How to get a guy to kiss you when you want him to]
15. Get on the dance floor
There’s something about a heavy beat that makes your hips sway back and forth. It’s even better if a guy is dancing with you. Get the guy on the dance floor to make your first move *literally.*
It’ll be harmless at first, but once you two start syncing, well, he won’t be able to keep his hands off you. [Read: 30 subtle, obvious and really sexy flirting tips for girls]
16. Comment on his posts
If you follow each other on social media, why not comment something funny or flirty on his posts? Don’t make it too obvious that it seems like you’re desperate for his attention. Do not spam his posts, just one comment for every few posts is enough.
And if he posts something on his stories, react to it and reply with a good conversation starter. [Read: How to stalk on social media & find just what you’re looking for]
17. Display romantic gestures
Who said only guys can do romantic gestures? You can do it too, and you definitely should.
No, you don’t have to write him a ten-page love letter or profess your love to him with a flash mob. You can make a move on the guy you like by offering to help him with simple things like buying him coffee or cooking for him.
Guys are always expected to make more effort, so show him that it shouldn’t always be the case. [Read: 55 romantic text messages for him & ways to make a guy feel loved]
18. Respect his boundaries
If you make a move on this guy and he doesn’t show much interest, give him the space he needs. If he tells you he doesn’t feel the same way, continuing to pursue him isn’t always a good idea.
What many people don’t get is that men can say no, too. Just because he’s a guy, it doesn’t mean he has to take whatever you offer. No means no, so take your rejection like an adult and move on. Men should expect the same from you. [Read: Am I codependent? Signs you’re clingy & overstepping boundaries]
19. Be yourself
When you make a move on a guy, you may be tempted to act a certain way that you think they’ll like, even if it’s not who you are. Yes, you may grab their attention. They may like you back. But is it worth it if you can’t be yourself around them?
You’re the only one you should change for. Remember that. [Read: How to focus on yourself in a relationship & avoid losing yourself]
20. Be confident
Confidence is the key to any successful relationship, whether it’s a romantic relationship, friendship, or business partnership. Be confident and you’ll automatically attract people.
When you make the first move on the guy, make sure to show him that you know yourself inside out. You know what you’re worth and how sexy you are. If you can’t convince yourself that, then he won’t believe it. [Read: How to ask a guy if he likes you like a super cool & confident girl]
21. Are you on the same page?
Before you make a move on the guy, you need to find out what he’s looking for. What if he wants a serious relationship and you just want something casual? It could also be the other way around. Miscommunication may lead to one or both parties getting hurt, which is something you should avoid.
So, be clear from the start about what you’re looking for and make sure he has no problem with it. [Read: Guys & casual relationships – why they like it & what they want from it]
22. Do it over text
If making the first move in person is scary, you can always do it over text. The disadvantages are that you may not get an immediate reply and not know his true emotional reaction to it.
But you’ll be less nervous and will have time to think about what to say and how to respond. [Read: When a guy stops texting you every day – why & what you NEED to do]
23. Just ask him
Are you terrible at reading signs and don’t know how to subtly flirt? Well, then just ask him. There’s nothing wrong with being straightforward. A lot of men actually find it hot.
If you don’t want to play games or make too much effort, go ahead and say you find them attractive, then ask if he’s interested in getting to know you or going out with you. You’ll actually save a lot of time by doing this.
Who says guys have to be the ones to make the first move? If the guy you like isn’t doing anything, don’t wait around for him to start. Use these tips to quickly move your relationship to the next stage.